Michael the clone is 8 years old
I talked to my clone at the hospital using Windows Live; he is allowed to use the computer when he’s supervised. He has been in trouble again, the nurse screamed and made a complaint apparently. She was giving him a rub down in the shower and he was unbuttoning her uniform; he said she didn’t complain until he got to the last button and then screamed the place down.
He was told that because of his behaviour he would have to see a child psychiatrist. He was only cloned in 2003 and so legally he is only eight years old this year. He refused to see a child psychiatrist, complaining that he didn’t even know they trained children to be psychiatrists. He saw someone eventually and she asked some embarrassing questions. He is aging at twice the normal rate because they haven’t perfected the cloning process and so is going through puberty at 8 years old. This is why he is suddenly so interested in those hot young nurses. He likes the night nurse in particular, she tucks him in and gives him a goodnight kiss; well she sees him as a sweet eight year old and forgets his hormones are now raging. I think they will have to teach him to bathe and shower himself soon or he’ll do more than just undo a few buttons. The psychiatrist said he was too institutionalised and said he couldn’t escape now even if he wants to, she advised he be allowed more freedom and he can now go upstairs and use the restaurant and cafes. He has found the cash machine and now knows about money. He wants some! He suggested we have a joint bank account so he can use the cash machine; he has no chance of sharing my money.
I told him to ask for payment when they want to experiment on him; they usually get paid quite well but they have used him to test all sorts of stuff for years and he never got paid for it. He could make more money than me if he gets his act together. He is so used to medical procedures that he appears to have no fear of them. They can thread 30 feet of plastic tubing in the one end of him and out the other end and he doesn’t even flinch. In fact if it’s a hot nurse he will volunteer for it!
He is particularly fond of the more naïve student nurses; most of them learn quickly not to be alone with him in the shower room!
Anyway, I said I would meet him on Wednesday and we could have a cup of tea or something in the café. If they want to thread 30 feet of tubing through me on Wednesday, Michael can go instead of me! I might leave him a little money so he can buy the odd cup of tea and I suppose I could take him some things; a bunch of grapes and a magazine? Do they do magazines for clones? They do magazines for most interests; I’ll get Psychology Today or the Nursing Times if they don’t. If he has the Nursing Times, he will have all those hot young nurses around his bed asking to borrow the latest copy; that would cheer him up. It’s strange how we think alike…
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I know my clone is only 8 years old this year which could explain why the night nurse tucks him in at night and gives him a goodnight kiss; but on his record it says he is 185cm tall. That is as tall as me! That is 6ft 2 inches; surely that nurse has noticed his feet sticking out of the bottom of the bed; none of those beds are long enough. It seems suspicious to me; this could be leading up to some form of child abuse.
They must have noticed he is going through puberty, they give him a shower or bath every day. He did say one of the more experienced nurses told him the facts of life and all about sex; so she noticed something! I think giving him sex education in the shower is a bit spooky; it sounds like he gets horny enough without any encouragement from a more experienced nurse. I hope it was nursing she was experienced in and not giving 8 year old clones sex education lessons in the shower. It does save me explaining things to him though; I wouldn’t relish that little job. He wants me to teach him how to use the cash machine, but he doesn’t have a cash card; he wants mine! I’m not supplying him with a cash card and a credit card is really out of the question.
He saw a nurse doing online banking and he wants to know all about that too and online shopping! I can imagine the things he would buy online; toys to take in the shower with him probably. He does need more clothes; I suppose I’ll have to buy those. They won’t let him wander around the hospital in his pyjamas. He mentioned he needs a new bathrobe too. This is going to cost me money; he will probably have a list of things when I see him tomorrow. I haven’t got his magazine and bunch of grapes yet…